Expanding Our Capacity to Be With Chaos

We don’t like chaos.

It is uncertainty, overwhelm, a feeling of groundlessness, being unmoored, out to sea without a compass.

And it usually triggers a shut-down response in us: hide, avoid, procrastinate, try to get control, anxiety, or wanting to give up. Or not wanting to even start in the first place, if we know there will be chaos.

I’m here to advocate for the beauty of chaos! It is the fabric of life, and we can never escape it. What we can do instead is slow down, get quiet, and open to the beauty of chaos.

This takes tremendous practice.

Let’s talk about it.

Chaos Can Be Overwhelming

We like order, and when things are messy or chaotic, it can feel scary or overwhelming.

A few examples:

  • I’m going off to college and am feeling overwhelmed by the idea of a roommate and there being so many people around. It feels like I won’t have my own space.
  • I worry about getting into a relationship when I’m just learning to take care of myself, and enjoying having alone time. I don’t want to get too entangled and then hurt the other person by breaking it off later.
  • My spouse is unpredictable with their emotions, and I never know when they’re going to get frustrated or shut down.
  • My life is overly full right now, I feel scattered and all over the place and I can’t focus on anything!
  • I’m at an event with so many people, I am not used to people being around, how can I handle the overwhelm?
  • My health has taken a bad turn, and I feel helpless and lost.

These are just a few ways that chaos shows up for us. In fact, it’s always present, in small and big ways. The world is unpredictable, dynamic, swirling. And we often don’t want to be with all of that.

There is so much possibility if we let ourselves be with chaos.

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